Greed
by princess-ni
Summary: Sworn rivals since their difficult childhood, a princess and a soldier clash amidst humanity's resurgence on a new and hostile planet, ultimately realizing that the line between hate and love runs thin. (Following Irina's and Murderess/Sharon's relationship throughout the series, behind the scenes.)
1. Prologue

**Prologue: The Dark Side of Moscow.**

* * *

A mountain of rubble and cobblestone. A building that once was, but no more. A young girl climbs, trailing behind her two boys, around the same age. Casualties of human neglect. This wasteland is their playground.

She reaches the top first, pale skin covered in sweat and ash. She smiles and brushes away strands of short, almost platinum blond hair.

"Irina!"

One of the boys calls from below, obviously struggling with the climb.

"It wasn't a race, you know!"

The young girl laughs.

"Last one up has to get papa's vodka, remember?"

The boys stop, stare at each other, and continue the climb with newfound desperation. Iina's brother, Leon, is the faster climber.

"Ha! Gwin has to do it!"

The youngest boy, Gwin, finally reaches the top with a defeated groan.

"This isn't fair, he's not even my dad. And he's scary."

Leon and Irina exchange mischievous grins. Gwin is visibly stressed out. Leon playfully shoves him.

"Relax okay, we won't actually make you do it. Besides, he asked Irina."

The girl sticks her tongue out at them, knowing full well she'd end up running the errand anyway. Papa always sent her, the oldest. And he always sent her without money. It was supposed to teach her resourcefulness, or something like that. Irina sighed quietly to herself.

"I know."

Despite the uncomfortable, harsh lessons, Irina had great respect for her father.

Across the horizon, the children watched as the sun began to set behind the mazes of stone buildings. Webs of clothing lines draped across from window to window. Old babushkas stood out on their porches with hair rollers and cigarettes. Distant graffiti peeked around the walls of neglected buildings. From down below, they could hear the sounds of the streets. Sirens and cars and people and white noise.

They liked the feeling of being up high, surveying their city away from the barbed wire. In the far off distance, the lights of the wealthy began to turn on.

Irina slowly ran her fingers through her hair, as if an act of preparation.

"Okay you two. Help each other home. Leon, tell papa I'm not far behind."

The boys salute her as she descends into the streets, like a soldier.

* * *

Irina had a system, the young girl was clever. Years of living on the dark side of Moscow had taught her to move through the streets like a rat. Beg, lie, steal, and trust no one.

Moving to a part of the city less populated by police was risky, but it was the only way to beg for money without being forcefully removed.

She held out her hands at the passing crowds, hunching her shoulders in order to appear more frail, and sympathetic. Being a girl also helped to gain sympathy, but it was a double-edged sword. People felt sorry for her, yes. But if she appeared too weak, wicked men will start to notice. She kept alert.

It was busy on this night, thankfully earning her enough to scrape up a bottle for Papa. She retreated to a less populated area, in order to count her money without drawing attention.

Suddenly, a sound from the alley behind her. She tenses, quickly shoving her earnings into her trousers. Irina prepares to face the presence with aggression, her default.

When she turns to see the perpetrator, her eyes widen. It wasn't a wicked man, or a thief, or police. It was a girl about her age.

Irina knew of many slum children, but had never seen this girl before. Irina cannot help but stare. The girl is covered in rags, a mess of tangled white-blonde hair hangs over her face. It's short and blunt, as if she had just cut if off herself without care. Her face is soft and slender, but much too mature for her age. The streets will do that to you.

And her eyes, Irina could not look away. Brown? No, violet. Gleaming in the night lights hanging above the alleyway. Irina knew those eyes. They were the eyes of someone who had seen death.

The silence between them was finally broken, when the mysterious girl spoke.

"I was watching you. You're pretty good."

She began to move closer, this made Irina tense up again.

"Watching me?"

"Yeah, taking money from those people. Could you teach me?"

The girls are now facing each other, too close for Irina's comfort. The girl is staring at Irina quite intently. There is something about her. A feeling Irina does not recognize right away.

"Who are you?"

Irina asks as if she's talking to someone from another planet.

"Will you help me if I tell you?"

Irina nods, cautiously.

The girl then swiftly moves her lips to Irina's ear. The sudden closeness causes Irina to freeze. The girl's whisper is warm against her skin.

" _Sharon_."

Irina would never forget that name.

* * *

Author's note: I felt it was important to begin with a snippet of how Irina and Sharon met, as well as prefacing their life and environment as children in the slums of Russia. So have a short prologue! Thank you for reading.


	2. Chapter 1: The Backstabbing Princess

**Chapter 1: The Backstabbing Princess**

* * *

Irina was furious, but not surprised.

"I will strangle her scrawny little..."

She almost spits the words out of her mouth through clenched teeth. Cross, her usually peppy teammate, now turns to her with a pang of guilt on her innocent face.

"I'm so sorry, this is my fault. I should have listened to you…"

"It's fine. She got us good this time."

Cross and Irina had just returned from a mission-gone-wrong with the Murderess, a woman notorious in NLA for her mischief and greed. Cross, being someone who believed everyone deserves a chance, was now suffering the consequences of trusting someone with a bad reputation. Irina had tried to warn her, all too familiar with the Murderess' charming tactics. She wasn't angry with the rookie however. More so, understanding.

The woman who they reported to, Eleonora, asked them with a curious confusion,

"Are you two still interested in taking the remainder of the reward?"

Irina sighs, and turns back to Cross who is visibly trying to make herself seem smaller in the embarrassment of the situation. They had been duped out of 40,000 credits. It was almost worse to take the remaining reward, than nothing at all. Irina shook her head.

"Cross you take it. I have no use for it."

Eleonora happily hands over a package, containing some standard gear. Cross accepts reluctantly.

"Oh, she also told me to send you a message."

Irina scoffs.

"Of course she'd want to rub it in my face…"

Eleonora interrupts her.

"Actually, it's not for you Irina. It's for your friend."

The two BLADE's are dumbfounded.

"Stop by any time, I'm always game for another adventure. Then she asked me to wink but… I don't think so!"

Irina makes a disgusted face at Cross.

"You just got yourself the world's worst fan."

* * *

Irina and Cross strolled through the Commercial District, headed for one of their favorite cafè's. They hoped a good cup of coffee would lift their spirits from the recent botched mission. Irina enjoyed taking a break from missions once in a while. She felt at peace when she could witness NLA's citizens carry on with their daily lives. It was comforting to know that, despite all of the darkness humanity had endured as of late, people could still enjoy the simple things. It reminded her of what she was fighting for, alongside her fellow BLADE's.

"So, what's the deal between you and that Murderess woman?"

Cross' question pulled Irina away from her mellow thoughts, and into irritation.

"Really? That's what you want to talk about?"

As they entered the café, modeled after an old Earth breakfast diner, Cross pressed on.

"Can you blame me for being curious? You seem to really have a thing for her."

Irina could have flipped their table over.

"I do not have a _thing_ , for that little backstabbing princess!"

The volume of her voice attracted the attention of several patrons around them. Irina uncomfortably cleared her throat and in a lower, almost hissing tone repeated:

"I do not have a thing for her."

Cross put her hands up in defense.

"I didn't mean it like _that_! I'm saying like, a vendetta or something."

"You have no idea."

Irina rolls her eyes, turning her attention to the window beside their booth. Cross orders from the waitress for the both of them.

"Is this all because she shot you in the back on that other mission?"

"Oh, it's a lot more complicated than that."

Irina let out a long, tired sigh.

"We've known each other for a looong time. That woman has done a lot more than just shoot my mimeosome in the goddamn back."

Cross stares intently at her friend, big blue eyes hungry for more. Irina was a private person. When she shared like this it was like winning the lottery.

Although, Irina was quick to notice she was already saying more than she wanted. She recoiled.

"Look, don't accept any more missions with her alright? Or do whatever you want. Just don't take me along."

Cross could tell by her tone the conversation was finished. _Eto zakoncheno_ , as the Russians would say. Or something like that.

"Alright, alright. Don't worry about it. We can talk about something else."

Cross knew better than to pry with Irina. Her privacy was respected. Though, Cross knew she'd get her to open up more eventually. She was patient enough.

"Let's talk about you instead. Any luck on your memory recovery?"

Cross shook her head, flopping back in her seat.

"Not at all. But I've gotten less bothered by it, to be honest. I'm making new memories now."

Irina smiles warmly at her friend.

"That's a good way to look at it."

The waitress brings them their coffee, steam lightly dances from the hot drinks. Cross takes a sip immediately, despite the temperature. Irina warms her hands around the cup. She suddenly speaks as though she is thinking out loud.

"Maybe you're the lucky one. Living without the weight of past memories."

* * *

Irina sat among a complete mess of scattered metal parts. On her lap lay a rifle that doubled her in size. She appeared childlike, legs crossed while sitting on the cold floor. The digital clock on the wall read 2:38AM in a bright red neon light. This wasn't the first time her anxiety kept her awake involuntarily. Today's coping task was finding replacement parts for one of her weapons.

Being alone in the quiet common room seemed to her like existing in a different dimension. During the day, it was filled with fellow members of her Interceptor division. People talking, cooking, venting, and laughing. The noise was comfortable. Now at odd hours, the room felt unreal.

Occupying herself with a mindless task usually helped calm her now. But tonight she was more on edge than usual. In the corner of the room, a record player skipped. Irina had attempted to fill the silence with a record from one of the archives saved on the trip. She couldn't bother to restart it, letting it skip over and over.

Irina clicked her tongue. She hated wallowing in her own discomfort.

 _Everyone's going through something. What makes me so special that I can't sleep because of it_ , she thought. It was true. The recent trauma of leaving Earth, settling on Mira, being hunted by hostile xenoforms… it was a lot to take. Everyone coped in their own way. Still, Irina wanted to hold herself to higher standards.

Her palm became sweaty against the wrench as she twisted, twisted, twisted. But the part simply would not fit. She cursed under her breath.

" _B'lyad_ '…"

"Hey now, such a dirty mouth."

Irina looked up and, to her dismay, saw the Murderess standing in the entryway of the common room. The two-piece sleeper she was wearing could be described as anything but modest. Irina was not surprised. She hardly ever was anymore, when it came to her.

"You are absolutely the last person I want to see right now."

She quickly looked back down at her weapon, forcefully rejecting any eye contact with the other woman.

"Oh unclench will you. I just came by to make sure your little friend got my message."

"Yep, she sure did."

Irina's tone was blunt. She continued to focus on the rifle in front of her. Twisting the wrench even harder now.

The Murderess begins to pace towards Irina, her hips swaying with every calculative step.

"Can I expect a call back from her, or did you shit-talk me too much?"

"You two could become best buddies for all I care, so long as I'm not involved. I let people make their own bad decisions."

The Murderess now stands directly in front of her, arms crossed, with a sly grin on her face. Irina's focus is broken immediately. No longer able to avoid Murderess' presence, her gaze moves from the rifle, up the woman's legs, to her torso, to her face. The Murderess always had a way of reeling her in. Her energy loomed over Irina, who looked up from her low position in a state of submission.

"You look so cute, sitting on the floor with your toys."

Irina's expression contorts further.

"Don't patronize me. Are we done here? You're free to get the hell out."

"You treat all your visitors so rudely?"

"Only the uninvited ones."

Murderess chuckles quietly to herself.

"What are you doing up this late anyway? Taking rifles apart of all things. How boring are you."

"I don't have to explain myself to you. It's better than barging into someone's barracks in the middle of the night."

The Murderess turns away, making her way over to the skipping record player. Irina watches her, one hand rubbing against her temple. She could feel the echo of a headache approaching. Their mimeosome bodies even mimicked human exhaustion, something she could do without.

"Why are you still here? Honestly? Cross will get in touch with you alright. You embarrassed her, but she's interested. I could tell."

"Oh yeah?"

Murderess adjusts the record player. Music once again fills the empty spaces in the air. The volume is low, and the melody is sweet. Bossa Nova, from the 60's. Murderess turns back to Irina, a look of surprised approval on her face.

"She kept asking about you."

"What did you tell her?"

"Oh just that you're a horrible bitch. Now please, leave."

Irina jerks a pointed finger towards the door. Murderess responds with an eye roll.

"Ugh you're so cranky today. Lighten up, I didn't shoot you this time."

Irina had enough. She abruptly stands up, the rifle sliding from her lap and onto the floor with a loud CLING.

"Look, if you're here to kick me while I'm down, go ahead! You couldn't have picked a more perfect time. You did it, you won again. You fucked me over!"

Irina claps her hands together, loudly and sarcastically. The Murderess no longer has a grin on her face. Irina continues, angry words spilling from her mouth like poison,

"Because that's what you _do_ , right? That's what you're _good_ at. And I'm the idiot who falls for it every single time! I've been nothing but a target for your sadistic games since the day we met. You dip your dirty hands into people's lives taking whatever you can, and you have the nerve to boast about it!"

Murderess has her jaws clenched, glaring at Irina, who glares back in equal fervor. Irina has never yelled at her like this before. And then she says something that really crashes through the Murderess' defenses.

"You always get what you want, don't you Sharon?"

Before Irina could continue, the Murderess suddenly closes the distance between them with a sharp stride. In the split seconds following, Irina prepared herself for a swift punch to the face. But it did not come.

Instead, the Murderess grabs a fistful of her tank top, and presses her lips against Irina's.

The Russian woman is frozen at first, her entire body numb. And then, she slowly melted into her senses. Murderess' skin, her lips, her smell. It all consumed her. To her surprise, she did not stop the woman. She didn't pull back. She didn't fight it.

The kiss was harsh, unyielding. It mixed anger with fire and lust and something else neither of them recognized. Murderess finally pulled back slightly. The women now staring at each other face to face, closer than they'd ever been. Irina saw something on Murderess' face that sent lava trickling down her spine. It was a dreamy vulnerability she had never seen before. Not on this woman's face, whose walls were built so high that no one could break through. But Irina saw it. Even if only for a second, before Murderess pulled her back in. This time, even harder.

Taking both her hands to Irina's hips, the taller woman took full control of her body. She began to push her back, keeping her torso firmly pressed against the other woman. Irina stepped back, surrendering into Murderess' overwhelming presence. Murderess forced her right into the wall behind them, pushing onto Irina's body as roughly as she pleased.

Irina's mind was a flurry of emotions. She let herself be pushed, and kissed, and groped. She was ashamed at herself for it, but she did not want Murderess to stop. All that controlled her actions now, was a wicked lust for this woman. This wretched, hypnotizing woman whom she hated and envied and…

An uncontrollable moan, soft and faint, escaped from Irina's mouth and into the other woman's lips. Murderess began to move her hips steadily into Irina, who followed the movement with intensity. Irina's arms had found their way around Murderess' back, clutching the soft fabric of her sleeper. She pulled on her, almost begging to push her harder into the wall.

Murderess suddenly pulls away, their lips reddened and bruised and wet with one another. She takes Irina's wrist, squeezing it until it hurts, pushing her arm into the wall. With her other hand, Murderess grabs Irina's jaw, forcing her to look into her eyes. Irina almost winces from the sudden pain. Their hot, heavy breaths mix together in the small gap between them, bodies still pressed tightly, legs tangled. Murderess finally speaks in between breaths.

"I always get what I want huh? You think you know about what I want? You think you know me now?"

She twists Irina's wrist, ever so slowly and painfully. Irina clenches her teeth.

"You have no idea what you're talking about. So keep your fucking mouth shut."

Murderess gives Irina one final shove before letting her go completely. Irina almost sinks into the wall, icy gray eyes piercing into the woman in front of her. The Murderess lingers for only a second more, before making a swift exit. Irina follows her with her eyes until she disappears, but not without slamming the door.

Irina is left with a haunting silence, only interrupted by the record player, which had begun to skip again.

Exhausted, she sinks back onto the floor, her back sliding against the wall behind her. She looks up at the ceiling, her eyes now drifting. She closes them, overcome by a sensation that both burned and chilled her to her very core.

* * *

Author's note:

1\. I based the Cross character in this story after the character I created on XCX. (Young girl, freckles, rosy cheeks, pink medium hair, and blue eyes).

2\. Not sure if this needed clarification, but the chapter occurs after the affinity mission "My Dream". I included some of the original in-game dialogue as a reference/starting point, but am not claiming it as my own work.

3\. I apologize if I jump back and forth between past/present tense in some descriptions. I am used to screenwriting, which is dominated by the present action. But some parts of this story, as I write them, feel more comfortable/true when in the past tense. I just go with it.

4\. This story is not pre-planned whatsoever. I am making it up as I go, with only few key points I know I want to cover. Where is this headed? It's a surprise.

5\. Thank you for reading!


	3. Chapter 2: A Woman Posessed

After a sleepless night of tossing and turning, Irina finally gave up with a racing mind and heavy body.

She rolled to her side and stared at the clock beside her bed, counting every tick until the roll call alarm went off in the barracks. 6AM sharp every morning.

Sitting up with a groan, she rubbed her temples in an attempt to press away the fatigue. A sudden hyper-awareness of her encounter the previous night now clouded her consciousness. Her mechanical heart beat uneasy in her chest.

Pieces of Sharon, her skin, her voice, her touch, her smell; It all cluttered Irina's mind.

She willed herself to stand, and dragged her feet to the common room, craving the distraction of human company.

* * *

"Ah Irina, good morning!"

Gwin greeted her with a fond smile. She liked his smile. It had stayed the same throughout all their lives.

"Morning."

Her own voice sounded foreign to her. Gwin noticed her excessive grogginess instantly.

"Rough night?"

"Like you wouldn't believe."

She sat herself by the counter, while Gwin fidgeted with a coffee maker on the other side.

"No worries, I'll get some caffeine in your system pronto."

Other members of the division lounged around the room, preparing for the day. The low hum of their conversations put Irina at ease. She crossed her arms over the counter, resting her chin down. The smell of coffee and toasted bread filled the room. She tried to focus on the little things.

Gwin places a mug next to her. Some of the liquid had spilled over the side. He'd always been clumsy like that.

"Drink up! We got a request to assist Elma's team today."

Irina sits upright immediately.

"The colonel asked for us?"

"Sure did, so we better be on our A game."

Irina would have usually been thrilled, but not on a day like today. Gwin couldn't help but notice her lack of enthusiasm.

"You okay boss?"

He leaned on the counter, getting a closer look at Irina's worn out expression.

"I'll be fine. "

She takes a sip of the dark drink, avoiding eye contact. Gwin proceeds,

"Are you sure? You look really down today."

"Just the usual lack of sleep. Nothing to be concerned about."

She manages a half smile. Gwin is not convinced.

"Whatever is bothering you... you can talk to me about it, you know?"

"I don't need to talk about anything. Don't waste your energy worrying about me, alright? You need to focus."

Irina uses an almost scolding tone with him. She finishes her drink quickly and quietly. Gwin retreats, changing the subject.

"How's the coffee?"

"Bitter. But I like it."

Relieved by her approval, Gwin takes a seat beside her. They finish their breakfast in silence.

* * *

Irina's team was made up of herself, Gwin, and their friend Marcus. Some of the best the Interceptors had to offer, and rightly so. All three had extensive military training dating back to their days on Earth. They were a top pick when it came to assisting in especially difficult missions, and Elma knew this.

Irina looked up to the woman with stars in her eyes. Any chance that her team had to work with Elma was a privilege. But on a day like today, Irina could not bring herself to concentrate. Not entirely.

Team Irina met with Elma, Cross, and Lin that morning in the Reclaimer barracks. The two teams collected themselves around a large table, while Elma went over the mission details. There was a group of particularly hostile indigens interrupting a Frontier Nav site. Elma explained,

"This disruption is costing us a lot of resources, and with the Ma-non and other xenos recently immigrating to NLA, we can't afford a shortage of precious materials…"

Irina tried to focus on the briefing, but the colonel's voice trailed off. Her intrusive thoughts were persistently swaying her into a trance.

Flashes of the previous night flooded her mind. She could not get the Murderess out of her head. The woman had tainted her like a poison.

A poison she willingly drank.

" _Why_."

Irina's eyes began to drift.

" _Why… didn't I stop her?"_

That question overwhelmed her.

After years of rivalry and hostility between the two of them, Irina had developed and deep-seated hatred for the Murderess. A hatred that had fueled a fire within her since their first encounter as children in the slums. But when the Murderess had grabbed her, and pressed their lips together, the retaliation Irina expected from herself simply did not come.

Irina was baffled, and completely infuriated. She felt as though the Murderess was playing an entirely new game with her. A treacherous and conniving game that had already begun to root itself in the pit of her stomach.

There was something else that sickened her, possibly most of all.

" _I kissed her back."_

Irina shifted in her discomfort.

" _I didn't want her to stop."_

Admitting it caused a foul taste in her mouth. Her ego shattered within her body.

Perhaps it was the fact that she witnessed a rarity: the Murderess in a state of vulnerability. Those usually mischievously sharp violet eyes had given in to Irina, however briefly. Or perhaps it was the surprise of it all, the evocative sacristy of being touched by a woman she considered untouchable.

Or, Irina thought shamefully, perhaps it was the feeling of being temporarily _desired_ by the Murderess. A woman so difficult and elusive and utterly terrifying. Someone Irina loathed yet envied all the same. A part of her twisted inside, burning in vulgarity.

That feeling _excited_ her.

"Irina?"

Elma's commanding tone crashed through her senses.

Irina almost cracked her spine straightening herself out.

"Yes, colonel!?"

She looked around the table, realizing the volume of her voice had been much too loud. All eyes were on her.

"Were you listening, soldier?"

Irina swallowed her embarrassment.

"Yes ma'am!"

Elma lingered a stare of concern at Irina, before continuing,

"It's not like you to be absent minded, Irina. I need you all alert. We're moving out."

This time the rest of the team joined in,

"Yes ma'am!"

* * *

On the way to the site, Cross tried approaching her lightheartedly.

"It's beautiful out today! Why so glum?"

She was right, the weather in Primordia was sunny and forgiving.

"I didn't sleep."

Irina's tone was blunt.

"Ah, is that why you were dozing off in the meeting? You sure you're good to be out on a mission? Maybe you should have taken a day off? Is it your anxiety?"

Irina really liked Cross, she was caring, responsible, and worthy of the term 'cute'. But her excessive questioning made Irina want to punch her square in the face.

"Listen carefully, because I'm not gonna say this again: I. Am. Fine."

A tinge of temperamental sarcasm was apparent in her response. Cross raised an eyebrow, and looked towards Gwin for an explanation. His reply was an exaggerated swipe of hand across his throat as if to say: "Cut it out!"

Cross laughed timidly.

"Sorry! Didn't mean to pry."

Irina sighed.

"Does it even matter? We're in these mimeosomes after all. Lack of sleep shouldn't be a problem."

"I guess."

Lin, the youngest member of team Elma, couldn't help but overhear the conversation and chimed in cleverly,

"Actually, if you think about it, exhaustion affects the mind more that the body. Even if our conscience resides in mims, we are at the mercy of our feelings."

Her explanation gained an icy glare from Irina. The girl nervously changed tone,

"Ah but, if you feel fine then that shouldn't matter! Nope not at all!"

Lin hurried ahead to catch up with Elma, promptly removing herself from the radius of Irina's moody energy. Irina trudged on, sandwiched between Cross and Gwin who awkwardly kept silent in fear of upsetting their irritable friend.

* * *

"Gwin! Behind!"

Irina's cry rang in his ears, but the younger soldier couldn't respond fast enough.

"Damnit!"

The two teams, upon arrival at the FN site, had been ambushed by an aggressive pack of Grexes. This one unusually large in numbers, and led by a vicious alpha. The pack had lay ruin to the entire area, and now led their attacks on the party members.

The alpha braced herself and launched her jaws towards Gwin, whose back was turned as he faced a flurry of other pack members.

Irina, in one swift motion, aimed her rifle straight on towards the alpha. At this range it was impossible for an experienced soldier like Irina to miss.

But she did.

Irina watched in horror as the bullet flew just above the alpha's head.

Irina _never_ missed.

Panic struck her as the monster closed its fangs around Gwin's arm.

She set forth in a pounding run towards the beast, Gwin shouted in agony.

With brute force, Irina shoved her rifle into the jaws of the alpha, prying it open and setting Gwin's arm free. She immediately began to shoot into the beast's mouth.

Her technique however, was careless due to panic. Marcus and Gwin could do nothing but watch as the alpha lay one final blow into Irina before falling over with a belly full of bullets. The grex shoved the tip of her knife-like tail straight through Irina's gut.

Irina cried out. The pain was excruciating. She fell backwards as the beast did the same. Her teammates called to her from a distance. She could see the blurry silhouette of Marcus running towards her. Elma shouted orders at Lin to shut down her mim in distress. Everything was slowing down. Her conscience was fading. Her mimeosome was leaking a bright blue fluid, pooling all around her fallen body. The sight caused her to go into shock.

Then everything went dark.

* * *

The first thing she heard was the low rumble of machinery. Steady, almost soothing. When she opened her eyes, she saw a white tiled ceiling. The lights were dim. She began to feel her body, her limbs twitched under thin white sheets. Her bare skin felt cold, vulnerable. Beside her a large device monitored her vital signs. She knew where she was now; The mimeosome maintenance center.

A woman in scrubs suddenly entered the room. Irina tried to sit up, but it was difficult.

"Easy there soldier. Your mim took quite a beating."

The nurse's tone was very matter-of-fact.

"You're lucky we had the spare parts. Those were some nasty wounds."

She flipped through a clipboard, writing in bits of information here and there.

Irina groaned, lying back down. Her memories were starting to return. Slowly at first, and then in an overwhelming rush.

"Gwin… Marcus…. Where are they?"

"Oh they're just fine. Nowhere near as bad as you were. Pretty rough going out there today huh?"

The nurse pushed a few buttons on the device, then began to remove the sensors from Irina's body.

"You're lucky to have them on your team. They brought you in just in time, a minute later and I don't think we'd have been able to save your mim."

The nurse helped her sit up in the bed, and placed her neatly folded clothes on her lap.

"I'll send them in to see you."

* * *

"Irina! She lives!"

Gwin rushes to her and embraces her like a child. She gently pats her palm on his back. Marcus stands before them with arms crossed.

"What the hell happened out there?"

Irina looks down in guilt.

"I let you both down. I let the colonel down. I'm sorry."

Marcus sighs, un-crossing his arms and kneeling down beside the bed. Both men look tenderly towards her.

"You had an off-day. It happens. Don't beat yourself up over it."

Gwin smiles and adds,

"Yeah, it could have been a lot worse!"

Irina remained somber.

"I missed."

Marcus and Gwin looked at each other, then back to her.

"I never fucking miss."

* * *

When night came, Irina was invited by Lin and Cross for dinner together. Irina loved Lin's cooking, but she was uncomfortable in their presence. Still wallowing in self-condemnation, Irina was harder on herself more than anyone.

But Cross had insisted.

"No one is mad at you, we're all just glad you're okay. Everyone screws up from time to time y'know?"

"Yeah, but I can't afford to be a screw up."

Whatever Lin was stirring in that giant metal pot made the common room smell heavenly. Cross stood by the counter, carefully cutting an assortment of vegetables. Irina rested her head on the couch cushion behind her, a warm towel on her forehead.

"You were right Lin, I was too exhausted to be out on a mission like that."

Lin smiled.

"It's okay, we know how stubborn you can be."

"Oh you do, do ya?"

Irina's response was vexed, but Lin still giggled childishly to herself.

"So are you ever gonna tell us what's bothering you?"

Cross joined Irina on the couch, setting three plates down on the table in front of them.

"It's nothing. I just, didn't sleep."

Irina pulled the hot towel over her eyes in escape.

Cross scrunched her face.

"Look, whatever it is, it bothered you enough to put your life in danger. You don't have to share, but you need to get it sorted out before your next big mission."

Irina admired her friend's intuitive nature, and was also aggravated by it.

"I know, okay? I know."

Lin joined them shortly after with a pot of stew that had everyone's mouth watering and quickly forgetting their troubles.

"Eat up you two! I even made enough for seconds this time."

Irina let her guilt dissipate in the company of her friends, whose laughter and gossip shared over food lifted her spirits no matter the occasion.

* * *

It was late by the time Irina left to return to her barracks. She took the long way, walking through the administrative district under soft streetlight. When you looked up at the sky in Mira, you saw two moons instead of one. They glowed in the night sky like beacons of purple and blue hues. The stars seemed so much closer here than they were on Earth, orchestrating a theatre of light across the endless darkness.

The air was brisk, the streets quiet. Irina found herself walking to the edge of the district, away from the lights and few bodies still out at this hour. She had always been drawn to less populated areas. She felt safe in corners, darkness, and solitude. A trait she picked up as a child.

She came to the brink of the district, where the walkways stopped. Below her, a pool of Mira's saltwater glistened in the moonlight. NLA had many undeveloped areas like this, where platforms dropped into the waterway systems below. Irina wrapped her arms around herself, her skin cold. The sounds of the waves sloshing against metal bars below were almost trance-like.

And then she saw her.

The Murderess sat alone in the distance, legs dangling over the edge of the platform, smoke from a cigarette swirling around her. She seemed lost in thought, failing to notice Irina staring with wide eyes.

A sudden rush of emotions overcame Irina at the sight of the woman. Anger, confusion, and a desire to know what she was thinking. Her stomach churned with uncertainty and excitement. She found herself walking towards the woman. Her heels clicked hard against the metal pavement, like a bull charging towards the Matador's red cape.

The Murderess noticed her presence from afar, but only turned around when Irina arrived at her side, standing above her with glaring eyes. No words came out of her clenched jaws.

So the Murderess spoke first,

"What are you doing here?"

It was almost a whisper. Smoke poured from her lips as she talked. The stars were reflecting in her lilac eyes, creating a universe of their own. Irina was at a loss for words, overwhelmed by the woman who had caused her so much distress in the past 24 hours.

The Murderess took another drag, flicking the ashes into the water below. She seemed nonchalant about Irina's company.

"What's the matter kitten? You gonna say something or are you just here to stare?"

"I missed!"

Irina practically blurted out her response.

"I missed the shot. It was right there, right in front of me. And I _missed_. I botched the mission. I got sent to the mim center. I never fucking miss."

Murderess raised an eyebrow, judging her mistake.

"It's because of _you_."

The Murderess placed a hand over her chest.

"Me? You know, it's not healthy to blame your sloppy mistakes on others."

She wore her signature smirk. Irina wanted to wipe it off her face.

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why did you kiss me?"

Irina finally said aloud the question she'd been asking herself all day.

The Murderess rolled her eyes, and looked towards the water below.

Silence. Irina grew agitated.

"Why did you kiss me!?"

Murderess flicked the butt of her cigarette into the waves.

"Because I was mad at you."

Irina scoffed.

"That doesn't make any fucking sense."

The Murderess began to stand, facing Irina with a viper-like stare.

"Hey it worked didn't it? It shut you up real good."

Irina swallowed. She realized how close they were to each other now, and stepped back immediately.

Murderess crossed her arms and tilted her head to the side.

"I didn't expect you to kiss me back."

A chill was sent down Irina's spine. Her insides stirred restlessly. Murderess stepped forward.

"Especially not so, intensely like that."

Irina could _feel_ it. She could feel the Murderess' words wrapping around her like tar. Every step the Murderess took towards her, Irina answered with a step back. Suddenly there was no more room to step back. Irina stood with her heels at the edge of the platform; below her the flowing water mirrored the night sky above. A black sea of stars.

"Whatever sick, twisted game you're trying to play, I want no part in it."

"Don't try and act so serious. You're not fooling me."

Murderess began to run a slender finger over Irina's shoulder. Irina could feel her body tensing under the touch. She wouldn't fall for it again, not like this.

"Enough!"

She forcefully took the Murderess' wrist into her fist, pushing her own body forward, forcing the Murderess to step back. Her smirk turned into surprise.

"I want you out of my head. Stay away from me."

Her words were tainted with resentment. Murderess frowned, and snatched her wrist away from Irina's hand.

Irina didn't waste any more time, briskly walking past the other woman and heading towards the barracks.

There was no feeling of closure, or accomplishment in walking away from the woman. Instead, a part of Irina ached to turn back and pick a fistfight with the Murderess. Or kiss her again.

She couldn't tell which feeling rang stronger in her gut.

* * *

Author's note: This chapter is long. Hmm.


End file.
